Date: Mon, 4 May 1998 Subject: Re: anyone on it today?
Weekend report: Saturday - hung out in NYC visiting people. Drove to Providence in the evening.
Sunday - surfed Pt. Judith with about 20 guys out at noon. Wind was side/offshore with a nice shoulder high swell. Water was warmer than I thought, but got tired fast paddling around in my 5/4/3. Got out. Had some Ho-Hos and tea. Drove to C. Ave., where the swell was smaller with better shape from the offshore wind. Only two other people in the water. Caught a lot of fun waist-high waves. Fell asleep at dinner party that evening in Providence.
Monday - Checked Pt. Judith abt. 11 am; low tide and onshore winds. Drove to Matunuck and paddled out at Deep Hole. Looked abt. waist high from shore, but as the tide turned the waves bulked up. Caught some nice shoulder-high lefts thru intermittent showers. Fun session. Drove back to Brooklyn. Blah.
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 Subject: thursday report
got out this afternoon, thursday, at Lido from about 12:30 to 2 pm.
swell was disorganized, random peaks coming in at about waist to shoulder high. i think the extensive shoals that formed near pt. lookout helped to break up the lines because further west, at Wyoming st. in Long Beach, the swell was better lined up.
water temp was around 50 -- comfy in a leaky 4/3. Probably can dispense with the gloves soon. wind was very light, so what waves there were, were glassy. unfortunately there was also something in the water that looked a lot like raw sewage. some locals told me that there are two outfall pipes near there and that a couple of guys they knew had gotten sick lately, probably from swallowing some of that bad water. it's great to be back in new york.
Date: Mon, 18 May 1998 Subject: In God's Hands -- NYC
For those of you too hung over to pick up the Sunday NYT, the movie In God's Hands is playing at two Manhattan theaters now: Cineplex Odeon at 1st and 62nd 505.2436 #957; and the Art Greenwich Twin at 12th St & 7th Ave 505.2436 #616.
Once again Hollywood has marred a perfectly good surf flick with the imposition of a plot. The 35mm footage of Doerner et al charging 40-ft outer reefs is breathtaking, although the final shot of Dorian supposedly free surfing Todos Santos while strapped to his board blows whatever surf cred the film had. And while Shane Dorian defines "flow" as a surfer, as an actor he embodies "post", as in "wooden". Still the director has the sense to let the surfers ride out their waves accompanied by good music and the travel segments are lush, if meaningless. Upshot: See it for the waves and Shaun Thompson's impersonation of Yoda.
In other news, The Beast of the East pro/am contest was held at Lido Saturday in beautiful summerlike weather. The waves were summerlike too; it was sad watching all those good riders frantically hopping their shortboards through 2-ft mush.
And for those Kooks without a summer share, the Coney Island Mermaid Parade will go off on Saturday, June 27. BYO hallucinogens.
Editors note: Sometimes Barney writes stories about surfing. Like that little piece I did for Longboard Magazine in March. Usually they're fun to write and sometimes I can even get a free trip out of the deal. But other times these articles are way more trouble than they're worth and you end up with a clip that you're too embarrassed to use. That's what happened with this story I did for Time Out New York about the surf scene at Lido and Long Beach. I was pretty happy with the first version and I didn't even mind answering the editor's questions in a slightly dumber second version. Then the editor's editors got involved and things got really stupid. If I wanted my stories subjected to editing by committee (read Goatfuck), I'd write for TV or movies and get paid more. Much more. So, kids, if somebody offers to revise your story with a team of editors, just say No Thanks, or you might end up with something like this.
Date: Sat, 30 May 1998 Subject: surf jones; beer cure
dr, how's it going out east? all reports have it flat to nil, but i suspect you've been trolling for waves on that barge anyhow. any luck?
i got in the water at rm5 on wednesday. beautiful sunny day was a good excuse to go total tanning with n. and i was a little surprised when a knee-high waves started capping over the sandbars at low tide. it was good to paddle around, but a sad imitation of surfing.
in despair i've turned to brewing beer. this weekend i'll cook up a wort for some india pale ale. Here's the recipe: 7lbs amber malt extract; 1lb crystal malt; one-half pound toasted malt; 4oz bitter Kent Golding hops; 1oz Cascade finishing hops. i'll probably jazz it up with some dried pears, ginseng, or st john's wort to give it that ineffable something, let it sit for a week, and then tap the whole 5-gallon brew into bottles. if you don't count labor, materials cost for 48 pints works out to about 50 cents a bottle. after a month of sitting in the bottles, it's ready to drink. maybe i'll call it hurricane ale, or baden brooklyn bitter, or flat spell ale ... or barney's brew!
if you need to borrow any brew tackle, or the brewer's bible, "the new complete joy of homebrewing" let me know. ps: when do you get your dog?
Editor's Note: CitySurfer has garnered an unprecedented amount of attention
lately. First there was the guy who called late at night to play me Beach Boys music (I
freaking HATE the Beach Boys) and then there was this unsolicited accolade that landed in
my e-mail box. This is exciting -- the next best thing to having my own stalker. Viz:
Thu, 25 Jun 1998 From: "Bikini.com Awards
Subject: Bikini.com Endless Summer Award
ALOHA AND CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! After surfing the net for days, the guys and girls at Bikini.com - The world's biggest beach party - have selected your web site at http://www.users.interport.net/~barney/ as cool enough to receive the Bikini.com Endless Summer Award!!! This is only sent to the few sites that demonstrate a high level of creativity, promote the beach lifestyle, or are basically a cool place to kick back and dream for a while. Believe us, those are few and far between.
So, enjoy the award. It's carries some real good aloha spirit with it, and it's not given to everyone. Best of all, it's easy to place onto your site. Just go to http://www.bikini.com/index/endless_summer_award.html. There, you'll find the award, and a few lines of coding that will make putting it on your page real easy.
So, once again, CONGRATULATIONS in a big way! If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us directly. We can be reached at award@bikini.com. Wishing you a very Bikini.com summer! Aloha.
Sat, 27 Jun 1998 Subject: Re: Palm Toddies
>can we get some more information on the "palm toddy's" We, at least I, am familiar with the "beer", being internationalist, that is.
Toddy is a fermenting fluid tapped from the top of a palm tree. Not from the coconut but from the base of the sprouting center frond. It is pleasant to taste and when fresh only mildly intoxicating, however if left for a few days it becomes a fairly strong alcoholic drink with quite a kick. As it requires no brewing and only the climbing of a tree to get a supply it has always been popular with the plantation workers in Malaysia.
Best regards John B.
Date: Sun, 28 Jun 1998 Subject: RM3 Saturday report
Finally got in the water after a 3-week hiatus. West winds yesterday morning made me think Sandy Hook or Long Branch would be the call, but winds came NW by noon so I drove out to Robert Moses instead.
Traffic was horrendous. Between Freaknik at Jones Beach, the Yankees game at Shea and bridge construction on the RM Causeway, what was normally an hour and twenty minute trip from Brooklyn became a 3-hour ordeal. It was worth it. Even for chilly waist-high swell hammered by a 20kt offshore breeze it was worth it. It was a little brisk for the short suit, but constant paddling kept me warm enough for most of the 2-hour session. No barrels, no big drops, just short left slides and a few rides prolonged by gentle turns and my own brand of spastic pumping. Apart from a kayaker, I was the only guy out.
After some food and a nap on the sand, I got back in for the late arvo session. The waves were weaker, but the wind had clocked around a few degrees north so it was almost directly offshore. And the clouds, which had threatened rain before, broke apart into armadas of cumulus scudding over a dark sea of nimbus in the kind of Turneresque display that makes one wonder about a higher power, or at least the possibility of divine art direction. The tide was coming in and the waves became more elusive. I hunted down a few more peaks and then packed it in. All in all not a bad Saturday.
If any Kooks are surfing RI over the holiday weekend, look for a beat-to-shit burgundy Nissan with VT plates: Barney will be dropping in on friends and strangers from Narragansett to Matunuck.
In other news, I'm back in the harness. After several months of freelance slacking, Barney decided to resume his webmaster/intranet consultant gig. It's a 10-6 in Midtown, but that doesn't rule out the possibility of a LI/NJ dawn patrol if the swell comes up.
July 6, 1998
The trip to RI was a partial success. Caught nice shoulder-high waves last wednesday arvo at Pt. Judith. Also small waist to knee-high stuff at Narragansett town beach on Thursday and Friday evenings. Then it got totally flat. However, I did finally meet Kira Stillwell, the kinetic and charismatic leader of Narragansett-based Chicks on Sticks, a women's surf club. Not a bad weekend.
Date: Mon, 6 Jul 1998
cd, thanks for the feedback on CitySurfer. I think it's due for the bi-annual update. I've
got a lot of info from this spring's Mexico trip that needs to go up.
this past weekend i was up in RI again. caught nice shoulder-high pt. judith on wednesday. unfortunately that was the best of the swell for the weekend.
being a surfer in CT might even be tougher than trying to stay wet in NYC. in general, RI is probably your best bet, although consistent west winds or a heavy south swell could make the drive to NJ, LI worthwhile.
make use of all the latest weather forecasting tools on the net to track approaching swell (see CitySurfer weatherpage), then double check by calling surf shop reports at your chosen break. That way you stand a better chance of catching some waves.
Good Luck -- barney
Sunday, July 19.
Robert Moses Field 2 worked for a few hours from low tide at 10:30 am into the early afternoon. Waves were in the waist high range and a bit lumpy from a light onshore wind. Swell was also very weak; a 10-ft. plank would have worked much better than my 8-ft. egg. Water was clean, green and warm, however.
As if you hadn't noticed, we're entering the third week in July without any hurricane action whatsoever. What's wrong with the weather?
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 1998
CBS news reported this morning that more med-waste had been found on Rockaway Beach
(between 30th and 116th Sts.). Specifically, clusters of syringes had been found on the
sand. Source of the sharps was unknown. Park's Commissioner Stern said no cause for worry.
Ah, urban surfing ....
Date: Sun, 2 Aug 1998
Subject: no surf sunday
this summer is the flattest i can recall. just checked reports on the beaches. the
"surf" is in the sub-knee-high zone. guess i'll be doing errands today.
i'll try again, when -- and if -- we get a swell.
Subject: Lucid dreaming, part 3
It's getting bad. Really bad. When you wake up in a sweat, paddling your mattress over a
clean-up set, sheets knotted around your torso like a shroud, it's time to seek
professional help. Years on the couch could probably straighten this out, but a plane
ticket to Tavarua would be cheaper. What would Dr. Jung say?
>Saturday morning I went surfing with Rusty Preisendorfer. Rusty had gone >from making surfboards to refurbishing Flexible Fliers. He had some fine >sleds stacked in his workshop.
>The surf was blown out, as afternoons often are on the West Coast. We >asked Rusty if there were any spots that were sheltered from the wind >where we might surf. He glanced at us with the kind of malevolent look >that old men of the sea reserve for inlanders. "Couldn't say," he said and >turned back to rubbing beeswax into the wooden deck of a 1930s vintage >Flexible Flier.
>My companions were members of that faceless mob that sometimes accompany >you in your dreams. There were two or three other fellows, surfers, >layabouts and stoners. We kicked around the workshop for a bit, which was >an open shed made of corrugated tin set on an arid hilltop facing the >ocean, and somehow ended up in the back of Rusty's station wagon smoking >bones.
>Come 5pm, Rusty put down his sander, pitched a couple of longboards in the >back of the wagon and took off down a dirt track into the brown hills. I >don't think he said a word to his baked passengers, but I remember looking >out the back window at our wake of red dust settling over the scrub and >thinking "Wow, Rusty's taking us surfing."
>On a windblown hillside, the road forked. The right hand fork was blocked >by an aluminium cattle gate. Rusty stopped the car, got out, swung the >gate open and shot down the road. The car lurched to a halt in a cloud of >dust when it could go no farther. We were parked on a desert headland >looking down at a sheltered cove where head-high waves were peeling along >a point.
>Rusty suited up without a word, grabbed a 7'6" and set out down the track >to the beach. I watched him go, then looked at my own 8' Stewart, which >was missing a chunk of foam the size of a brick (maybe that was the >occasion for my visit to the shaper). I pulled another board from the pile >in the wagon, something long and heavy, and followed Rusty down the path.
>The water was cold, but clean and the waves came roaring down the point >with a reassuring constancy. I crested one swell on the paddle out in time >to see Rusty tear the top off a hefty righthander with a powerful backside >turn. I felt that it would be a great session.
Date: Wed, 5 Aug 1998
>robert moses field 4 -- the only place that actually consistently breaks >on Long
Island
consistently weak. fellow brooklynite christina and i surfed there last saturday and it did break, but without any authority. waves were a mushy waist high at best. the water, however, was beautiful -- clear green and warm enough to trunk it. and, myriam, that board you passed along to christina worked great. just the thing for weak east coast waves.
still, a 10-foot plank was probably the best call for the day.
Date: Mon, 24 Aug 1998
brendan, myself and a player to be named later will be making the trip to north jersey
tuesday am. winds are forecast to be ssw, waves in the head high range, any suggestions
from the kooks? anybody else on it? Look for the beat to shit nissan with vt plates and
you'll find us
Intra-office Memo August 24
To: SM
Subject: Day off?
Could I take tomorrow off? Something's come up:
That big red spot north of the Bahamas is Hurricane Bonnie, the first proper storm we've had this season. Bouys off of Long Island are already starting to read a solid swell in the 6-8 foot range. Tomorrow at Sandy Hook NJ should be epic.
So, can I get out of here to go surfing, please?
Intra-office Memo August 24
To: Barney
Subject: RE: Day off?
Yea sure, we don't want ya moping around here anyway.
